25 July 2007

Bad Moon Rising

Since Augs was feeling down, I decided to tell a tale on myself....from high school. Yes, the place that always makes you feel stupider than dog shit and twice as unimportant.

Now, I had a friend named Patricia, who in an interesting turn of fate had the same name as that friend that decided her best friend wasn't as important anymore. She says, "Hey, the guy you're dating? Hit on me." That is one thing that will turn me into a screeching harpy. Hello, look at my family for reasons why. So, I'm of course gonna believe her, cause she's one of my best friends. Anyway, I confront him on our next date (which, for the record, was really only like our third/fourth, but you know high school dating). Long short, we break up. I'm upset and stuff, right?

Well, we have a business class, either keyboarding or more indepth of learning MS Office, can't remember which. I decide on the final day, where we actually took finals, to dress up in a dress, tights, and heels. Of course, I'm not a skinny mini, so I wear those girdle things. You know, the ones your grandma wears. Yeah, those. So I wear that with a dress. And I hate dresses, so much. Cause, dude, that requires tights/hose and those are bitch to deal with.

So I'm done with the final, and I need to go tinkle. I get a pass, go the 100 feet to the girls', do my thing and come back. I sit in my seat and when the bell brings, I'm ready to go. I've done the whole "Dude, you totally fucked up" thing girls do. As I'm walking to next period, and halfway there, some girl runs up and goes "You're dress is in your panties."

Oh, yes. Folks. I was showing my granny panties to the world! I was so embarrassed, I wanted to die. And I wanted to choke some females that hadn't told me. Not so great on a 10th grade ego, you know? I pull it down, right there, not caring because hello, I'm showing the world what I'm wearing, and I'm just so mortified. Because of all the work of finding a dress that I looked good in, was all jazzed up about making him pay...and all for nothing. I ended up looking like a fool. That's not very good with me. I don't suffer personal foolery well. Like, at all. So I'm hoping the day ends soon because it's like three days before break and I really, really don't wanna be remembered as Showgirl Wonder.

And the kicker? I found out in the end that he didn't make a pass at her. She was just lying cause she was jealous. I was not pleased when I found that out. I think if I'd been in a more pissed off state of mind I'd have smacked the girl all the way to Kalamazoo, as in the Michigan city, y'all. Of course, he did end up dropping out of high school the next year, but still! Damn it, that was my fellar. Bitch.

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Blogger Augs Casa said...

Hokie smoke what a funny read, I'm laughing with you, not against you of course. One day i'll post about ym shirt hanging out my zipper for 1/2 day during my high school days.

12:40 PM  
Blogger Jessie said...

No, you. You can laugh at me. I do now. Then, not so much. But now it's funny as hell. Clearly I watched too much Days of Our Lives as a kid, thinking that'd work out well.

You win, just from the description alone. *snort* Cause at least the bookbag hid some of my bloomers. You, not so much.

12:47 PM  

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