03 July 2007

Flipping That Switch

Soo...my temper? Is pretty hard to get up if you work in customer service. I'm awesome about talking to representatives, cashiers, bank tellers, wait staff...whatever. Because I was raised to be polite since they're doing you a favor. So, because of that, it takes a lot to get me yelling on the phone. Wanna know the top way? Pussyfoot when I'm asking a direct question, and trying to explain that, because my city so damn special, Bellsouth only has three cities in the country with my kind of DSL. I know this because when it was getting set up, the BellSouth people told us..repeatedly. Therefore, I'm not a complete dumbass, even if I'm not a computer tech major. When I tell you four freaking times, pay attention. Don't give me instructions that DO NOT WORK. Especially when I tell you this, time and time again. I'm sorry if you're not qualified, but hey, you're Tech Support. Therefore? Pay attention to what I'm saying.

I dealt with this from 11am-6pm last night. Seriously. Off and on, all day. First time, "oh, we're doing a network fix [except, he didn't use fix, but fuck if I can remember what it was called]. Call back after 1:10 if it doesn't work." This was after being hold for 15-20 minutes, with the lady recording going, "all our network representatives are busy" EVERY 15 SECONDS. Y'all? I had heard that the night before last when the storm knocked our DSL out in the first place. So I had to listen two times in less than 12 hours. Oh, and they use voice activation. God, that shit is awful. I can't even get a live operator. Seriously, they do not exist IN THE TECH DEPARTMENT.

I call back at nearly 3 since it still wasn't working, listening to the same damn lady talk every 15 seconds, with me adding lots of threats like, "If I hear you one more goddamn time, I'm going to kill you." 15 seconds later, "No, seriously. Gonna kill your ass dead." My irritation went ratcheting up higher and higher every time she spoke. 15 minutes later, I get to talk to someone. Who once again acted like I had helium holding my head up. Again, don't talk down to me. That'll press my bitch button quicker than she-who-gave-birth-to-me asking me to go get her liquor because she's too drunk off her ass to drive. Actually, that just makes me sad, since it's happened more than once. Either way, he was talking to me like that. Didn't turn out well for him. I started yelling. As referenced, I don't yell at people who are doing their job, because that's just not right. Talk down? Oh, hell yeah I will. Especially since I was again telling these yahoos that our DSL isn't like everyone's else and we don't have a company router because the company doesn't make them. We have to use LinkSys. (But when I set up LinkSys, the BellSouth people were nice enough to help me out, setting it up.)

Oh, right. BellSouth was bought out by AT&T not too long ago. Fuck me with a chainsaw, y'all. AT&T in Atlanta's a joke. We were thrilled to be out of their area when we moved out here. Now we're back in hell since it has the Atlanta monopoly.

Anyway, after finally flipping my shit, he still talked to me like I was a three-year-old. Bubba, don't even try that with me. I will fillet your ass and hand it back to you on a silver platter. He kept saying, "it's your computer." Uhm, it might be? But that's why you have tech guys come out and see. It's the crazy thing people are doing now. I got so frustrated that I handed the phone to my godmom, and went, "Here! Talk to him before I do something bad." She had no idea what was going on (she pays for the service, I'm the tech person on this end when listening to people who actually know what they're doing) but backed me up. All the way. And he started talking to her like he was me. I could tell by the expression on her face. That did it. I was sitting there, yelling about a foot or two away. "Don't try and pacify us." And he kept talking to her like he missed JESSIE FLIPS HER SHIT 101, and finally, when she was asking for his supervisor, he got downright rude. That's when I screamed, "GET YOUR BOSS ON THE PHONE NOW." He heard me. Because when the supervisor got on the phone line, I railed hardcore. He said, "I'll put an expedite order on it. It'll be two hours before he gets back to you." I was telling him that I wanted a tech out here last night, even if it was the last stop, because this was fucked up. I wasted all day, listening to tech advice, when he could have been out at one. Oh, and the tech, only works 1-5. Okay, whatever.

So I help my mom around after hanging up, because I had two hours. Turns out? Not so much. More like half an hour. I look at my cellphone at 4:30, and he had called an hour ago. Okay, fine. I call the number back, trying to get a hold of him. Not so much. You can't call it back, even though it's a work phone. You have to have a password to get in touch...with the TECH. Okay, whatever. This is why I hate and loathe AT&T with a passion. I finally call the tech support number AGAIN, get the same lady recording. Scream at the phone in frustration, call the main residential service, but she handed me BACK to the recording lady. I find out that the tech said he'd talked to me, and he totally hadn't. Still trying to figure out why he called on my cell, instead of the regular phone, since you know, that was fine. (Which is another mess for another day.)

Okay, so he was going to be here between 1-5 today. At 2, he arrives. Turns out that the lightning storm that hit about 100 feet from our house fried the networking card in my computer, only he replaced it, and hey, STILL didn't work. Fucking hell. So in the next couple of days we have to go to Office Depot and get it checked out.

Oh, and kicker? This is the second computer that this apartment has fried of mine. Same outlet, since it's the only close to the phone jack (well, the jack that works). The wiring in this apartment is fucked over. One phone jack can't be used, the other one in my room, because it kills the phone line. Then we have the various electrical outlets that we can't use anything with the power of say a vacuum because it'll either catch on fire, or cause half of our apartment's electric to stop working. Not to mention when they had to rewire in lines over the pantry (phone lines), by going into the ceiling and tying to make the wiring less fucked up. And the phone lines in the hall closet, where they all meet, is so screwed.

Oh, yeah. These apartments were well built. So that's where I was the past two days. One can only watch The Deadliest Catch so many times, by the way. I was so bored it was unreal.



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